lara simmons

"TRUST YOUR EQUIPMENT. "  -- Cat Saunders, PhD Today I want to talk more about one of the quotes I posted earlier in the week for #inspireMEMonday  because it was a breakthrough for me in terms of understanding why I sometimes struggle more than I need to in difficult relationships. As I explained in Monday's post, what this quote means to me is something along the lines of, "listen to yourself, listen to your body." In other words, if - after an interaction with another human being - you feel angry or hurt or yucky, don't just dismiss that, listen to it. That feeling is trying to tell you something. What I realized in my latest session with my counselor (Dr Cat) is that I have not been listening, for YEARS. When someone does something that hurts me or makes me angry I feel the feeling, but almost immediately I turn it around on myself and start berating myself: "Don't take it personally." "Let it go." "If you were a big...

"The only rule is to suffer the pain." --Rumi I have been immersing myself in Pema Chodron lately. Taking the Leap is on my nightstand. The Three Commitments on my iPod. Pema's voice in my head when I sit down to meditate. (I have even been experimenting with an "eyes open" meditation technique, completely anathema to me in the past.) One of the things I have learned - and am practicing - is what she calls "the 90-second thing." This technique comes via Jill Bolte Taylor (whose brilliant TED talk " My Stroke of Insight " is in the top twenty of most-watched TED talks ever) a brain researcher who studied herself as she had a stroke. One of the things Dr. Jill observed was that her emotions, when not fueled by thoughts, lasted only about 90 seconds and then dissipated. In The Three Commitments, Pema shares this discovery as a technique to use in your spiritual practice. As a way to train in being present, in resisting what she cal...